Posted by: facetothewind | June 8, 2008

Café Attitude

I had lunch the other day in Marin County with a couple friends at Café Gratitude. With an overpriced raw food lunch comes a generous helping of new age dogma. The waitress asks us if we’re ready for the question of the day. I braced myself. “What does unconditional love mean to you?” We decided unanimously that there was no such thing. We didn’t let on to our waitress.

I found the food incredibly tasty…the desserts out of this world, but the platitudes written on the walls, ceilings, a board game at the table, and the menu items were almost like a joke – as if they were trying to embody a caricature of all that seems shallow and flimsy in the feel-good, new age movement.

My friend ordered saying, “I’ll have the chocolate cream pie.” Our server said, “I Am Bliss?” “I prefer to order by the actual food,” my friend replied. “One I Am Bliss coming up,” she insisted with a straight face. When she brought the dessert, she got us one more time saying, “You are bliss,” as she placed the pie on the table. Alright already, I am bliss, godammit.

(Click below to enlarge.)

Affirmations in the bathroom? I was relieved to find that I didn’t have to read any while I was relieving myself, only while washing my hands of this nonsense.

I am relieved.

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